Finn Gratton, LMFT

finn gratton: A Trans Autistic Vision

Oh, we compromise or are compromised, just like everyone else, and, like everyone else, lose the thrumming pulse of here and now, get lost from ourselves, from life moving through us. Yet at the same time, we can’t help it, we keep sticking out, we keep not doing it “right.” A hand jumps, an eye twitches, a hum erupts. Life keeps moving through us. From our infancies we have been unintentional rebels against the colonization of our bodies, and we have paid for that rebellion since before we knew we were doing anything wrong. Some of us learned, through stick and carrot, to withhold, to draw away from life, while always knowing that the guard would slip, and with that slip, a piece of our personal wilderness would break over the bow. It would break and we would pay. We would pay in the coinage of rejection, of punishment and of shame. And that wild holy water of life that betrayed us would bless us too, bless us with remembrance of who we are, and what life truly is.